Thursday, February 12, 2009

A thoughtful, and yet entertaining solution to "The Gimmick"

The Gimmick got me thinking…

It’s just so, well, bland. Three guys, three shots, skate in, do your thing, one team scores one more than the other, everyone goes home.

There must be a better way.

Well, your ol’ pal Uncle Peerless has the prescription for your mid-winter overtime blues. We revamp overtime.

Round One – Four-on-Four.

We’d leave this part of the overtime unchanged. If a team scores before five minutes are up, everybody gets home before The Daily Show comes on. But, if not…

Round Two – Three-on-Three.

Now, we start to have some fun. It’s three-on-three with a catch. Only one defender can enter and defend in the defensive zone at a time; only two attackers can be in the offensive zone. The three-on-three stuff is a neutral zone thing, only, to advance the puck. If more than one defender occupies the defensive zone, or of all three attackers occupy the attacking zone…penalty. If we’re still tied after five minutes…

Round Three – Two-on-Two.

Here’s the catch. The skaters have to tie their legs together – sort of a “three-legged-race” thing. It would make for some tough strategy decisions. Imagine Alex Ovechkin and Michael Nylander tied together…one is attacking the net, the other is doing salchows in the circle. Or, do you put a forward and a defenseman together? Two defensemen? What if the defensemen are Mike Green and Jeff Schultz? And, if that doesn’t work, and we’re still tied after five minutes?...

Round Four – One-on-One

This is the “gladiator” round. The coaches pick one player, each. Whoever they pick, they have to stay out there for the entire five (or fewer) minutes. If a player goes down to injury, the player still standing has to await the call from the referee – thumbs up, he gets a chance to shoot a penalty shot at the other goalie. If the referee chooses thumbs down, the player gets to kill the player on the ice.

Round Five – Goalie on Goalie

This is the no-holds-barred, “ultimate fighting championship” portion of the competition. Anything goes…want to whack your opponent with the paddle of the stick? Go for it. Pick up a handful of snow and toss it into his mask? Be our guest. Whatever. Anything a goalie can do to get the puck in the other net – while letting off some steam that has been building up from being abused in his crease all night – well, use your imagination, guys. And if, by some stroke of fate, we’re still tied after five minutes?

Mascots. We just haven’t figured that one out, yet.

1 comment:

dbf8 said...

Instead of Mascots you should go coaches ah la Mighty Ducks 2.