The First "Old Man's Major Award" Award!

Ladies and gentlemen, it's time. Time to bestow the first "Old Man's Major Award" Award -- OMMAA -- to a worthy Capital.



The ballot boxes have been unstuffed, the bribes collected, the votes tallied, the chads swept up. And the winner is . . .

. . . a player who exudes cantankerosity, a player who can scowl with the best, who lives each day in the constant befuddlement of what his youngers are up to, who soldiers on every day with a litany of profanities that are charming in their incomprehensibility, an "everyman" sort of player who would just as soon repair the furnace in a suit jacket and vest as he would take a double shift on the power play.

Ladies and gentlemen, the inaugural recipient of the OMMAA is (drum roll please) . . . .


Jamie Heward!

Congratulations . . . display it proudly and prominently!