The Peerless Prognosticator is ON THE AIR!! -- Caps vs. Flyers, November 4th

The Peerless Prognosticator is ON THE . . .

. . . shhhhhhhhh, not so loud. We’re still getting out from under that adventure in suckitude last night (not to mention a couple bottles of Mad Dog 20/20 to “celebrate”). Let’s just leave that 4-3 loss to Atlanta where it belongs . . .

Tonight . . . uh . . . tonight, it’s the Flyers of Philadelphia in the City of Cheesesteakery Love. We’re here talking with some Caps fans about the boys and their chances against the East’s least . . .

Sir, what’s your name . . .

“Uh . . . you can call me ‘Rico.’”

Well, Rico, what do you think of the boys so far?

“I like what I see, but they are missing something . . . a guy with a lot of speed with a little bit of whisker under his lower lip.”

You mean, like Rico Fa- . . . hey, wait a minute!

“oops, gotta go . . . “

Let’s get a real fan in here . . . Sir, what’s your name?

“Some folks call me ‘Dub.””

Well, Dub . . . and I must say, you travel with a lot of well-dressed, burly men in sunglasses . . . what do you think of the Caps so far?

“Well, I think all this talk about changing di-rec-tion and redeploying players is wrong. I’m not saying that Caps fans who want Eric Fehr or Tomas Fleischmann or Coco to replace Slapshot aren’t patriotic Cap fans – heh-heh…heh-heh – they’re just wrong. The Caps have to stay the course to get the job done. If you bring some of the Bears down to Washington, the Phantoms will just follow them here.”

Sir, what in heaven’s name are you saying? That has to be the most cockamamie, idiotic . . . wait, wait a minute . . . hey, lemme go! LET ME G-mmph…mmnph….HEL-L-L-L-L-L-L-L-P!

“Ever been to Cuba this time of year?”

FILED EARLIER TODAY – The Caps get to change their luck tonight against a team for which nothing has gone as planned this year – the Philadelphia Flyers. It’s hard to find a glimmer of light in their statistics so far:

Wins: 3 (tied for 27^th and last with three other clubs)

Points: 7 (29^th)

Goals-per-game: 2.00 (30^th)

Goals-against-per-game: 3.92 (29^th)

5-on-5 goals for-against ratio: 0.48 (30^th)

Power Play: 8.1% (30^th)

Penalty Kill: 86.9% (9^th…they’re actually one of the least penalized teams in the league)

Record in last nine: 2-7-0

Number of general managers replaced: 1 (1^st)

Number of coaches replaced: 1 (1^st)

Number of angry fans showing up at Wachovia Center: don’t know, but it’s gotta be first

They’ve already given up eight goals in a game (at home to Pittsburgh) and nine in a game (at Buffalo) . . . Peter Forsberg got tossed from a game against Tampa Bay last time out, on Thursday, right in the middle of a comeback try by the Flyers . . . they’re beat up (Mike Knuble, Boyd Kane, Jeff Carter, and Randy Robitaille have a variety of injuries).

The Flyers aren’t 3-8-1 by accident.

If there was a chance for the Caps – they of the 16-game winless streak in South Philly (they have one measly point) – to end a miserable chapter in their recent history, tonight affords them perhaps the best chance they’ll ever have. The key is getting a jump on the Flyers to take the fans out of the game and turn them on the home club. The Flyers have been more than accommodating in that regard to opponents this year, having been outscored in the first and second periods by a 34-15 margin. Couple that with an inability to come back in games (no standings points earned in games where they trailed after two periods), and it is essential that the Caps get a lead, and (here’s the key part) . . . KEEP A LEAD! Actually, if you have other plans this evening, it might interest you to know that the first period probably holds the key . . . neither team has a win when trailing after the first period (and only one has a victory when giving up the first goal – Washington). This game could be “decided” early, one way or another.

Folks, it’s the resistible force meeting the moveable object. It will not be pretty; it will serve to populate no highlight film. But in the end, there will be something said for, “it’s not how, it’s how many.”

Caps 6 – Flyers 4.