This topic is circulating among the fellow wizards of this medium, and The Peerless couldn't let this opportunity slip by without a contribution. The Peerless encourages you to check out the links over there on the right to see what others' thoughts might be on the subject. In the meantime, ahem . . .
If I Was a Hockey Player:
Team: Washington Capitals
Uniform Number: 33
Position: Goaltender
Nickname: "Zeke"
Dream Linemates: we don’t have those at my position, but I want Rod Langway and Scott Stevens in front of me
Rounding out the PP: I don’t care, just keep the damn puck at the other end
Job: Breaking hearts of those who have dreams of Wayne Gretzky swimming in their addled little minds.
Signature Move: glove, covering the top corner
Strengths: quickness, anticipation
Weaknesses: handling the puck
Injury Problems? Left knee
Equipment: The same beat up funky old pads I’ve been wearing forever
Nemesis: None – I am their nemesis.
Scandal Involvement: 11.5 inch pads, the female cast of "Desperate Housewives"
Who I'd face in the Stanley Cup Finals: Detroit Red Wings . . . going back to my roots to steal their dreams.
What I'd do with the Stanley Cup after our victory: Take it home, hook it up to my DirecTV receiver and invite all the kids over to watch classic NHL games.
Would the media love me or hate me? They’d adore me – I can pound a subject and a verb together without it sounding like a coma-inducing cliché.
No comments:
Post a Comment