Welcome to Opening Night at Ver-r-r-r-r-r-rizon Center. The Peerless Prognosticator is coming to you live from Prognostication Central, where he is bringing you, the discerning hockey fan, the slam dunk prognostications for tonight…We’re joined by our coaches panel, which, if you remember back to last year, provided some of their keen insights…
“ho…I don’t know about ‘keen,’ Peerless”
Thanks, Coach Madden….their keen insights into what it takes to win. And now that we stand on the precipice of a toboggan run through the untrodden snow of a new season…
“You get a degree from one of those mail order writing schools for that?”
No, Casey…as I was saying, the untrodden snow of a new season.
“Didn’t you already play one game?”
Yes, Coach Wooden, the Caps won last night, 3-1 over the Thrashers.
“Then it isn’t ‘untrodden,’ is it?”
No, sir, I guess not…as we stand on the…oh, forget it. Coaches, the Caps are a retooled unit in all aspects – five-on-five, power play, penalty kill – and they have a new philosophy and a new outlook, some of my fellow prognosticators’ predictions, notwithstanding. Can they be better than last year?
“Oh, sure…”
Coach Madden?
“Well let’s look at this play from last year, for instance…you have Ovechkin here with the puck, and he’s skating out of his own zone – SCHWIP! – and you have these guys on defense moving over to him like this – ZAP!! – and he’s there barreling down the wing, and then the two defensemen slide over, one backing up like this to keep Ovechkin in front of him – BOOP! – and this other one sliding over to take the middle of the ice away – BING! So what’s Ovechkin going to do? Well, I say, “where is everyone else?” Standing around with a turkey leg in their hand?”
Now, look at last night…you’ve got all the Caps involved here…the puck goes here – ZING! – then it’s over here – SCHWAP! – then this rookie has the puck…what’s his name, “Backstroke…”
“Backstrom,” Coach…
“Yeah…and he slides the puck over to Rhinelander…”
“Nylander,” Coach…
“Yeah…and he curls out from behind thenet – SCHWIPIDDYDOODAH” – and buries the puck…the Caps would have just waited for Ovechkin’s next shift last year.”
Good point…Coach Lombardi?
“I think what John’s trying to say here is that all the pieces pull together like a team…they’re saying, ‘it’s our puck, and you can’t have it.’ And, they’re just not letting the other team have it – time of possession…we didn’t have that in my day, but let me tell ya…but my Packers always seemed to have the ball with Jimmy and Paul ramming it down the other guy’s gullet.”
Yes, Coach Wooden…
“I think Coach Lombardi is exactly right…it looked like all five guys on the ice last night at any time were on the same page. And that’s the key…you’ve got to have all five guys with their oars in the water, pulling together…”
Coach Rockne?
“I was watching the Caps take it down the left side…take it down the right side…take it down the middle…pass, skate, hit-hit-hit – well, maybe not enough of that…but they did what they had to do, they paid the price. They walked into the other guy’s house and played smart, played tough, played like my Irish teams did…”
Should we call them, “Capitol Domers,” Coach?
“Let’s not get silly about this, Peerless…”
Casey, what’s your take on all of this?
“Well, I liked that Backstrom kid…like I said once – or was it twice? – ‘ability is the art of getting credit for all the home runs somebody else hits.’ And that was the kid last night, moving the puck along to that Nylander kid for a goal. Kid played with lotsa moxie, like he’s been around a while. And like that other thing I said, ‘good pitching will always stop good hitting and vice-versa.’ Same here…good power plays will stop good penalty killing, and vice versa. Caps were one-for-seven with the extra guy, which wasn’t great, but they were four-for-four when they were short a guy.
Let’s go around the room one time…you’re predictions for tonight’s home opener…Coach Madden?
“Well, if the Caps can get out to a lead and keep the Hurricanes from taking that lead, I think the Caps will get out of it with a win.”
Uh…ok, Coach Wooden?
“Well, taking a page from Mr. Stengel, something I said once comes to mind…’I'd rather have a lot of talent and a little experience than a lot of experience and a little talent.’ The Caps are kind of green, and the Hurricanes have a few guys who have won a championship…but the Caps’ talent is better and more developed than last year. I like their chances a lot. Put me down in the Caps’ column.”
Coach Lombardi?
“Well, I’d like to have talent and experience (laughter). But, since we’re all quoting ourselves here, ‘A man can be as great as he wants to be. If you believe in yourself and have the courage, the determination, the dedication, the competitive drive and if you are willing to sacrifice the little things in life and pay the price for the things that are worthwhile, it can be done.’ If the Caps have the courage and the determination and the drive, and they’re willing to make the sacrifices good teams have to make, they’ll win. I have no doubt.”
Coach Rockne?
"Well, I’m thinking Coach Hanlon has his work cut out for him tonight, just like Coach Hartley did last night – opening night, with all the ceremonies and the delays and the distractions. But like I said, ‘an automobile goes nowhere efficiently, unless it has a quick, hot spark to ignite things, to set the cogs of the machine in motion.’ If Coach Hanlon can give ‘em that spark coming out of the locker room, it should be a good night. I’m going with the Caps.”
Casey?...you have the last word…
“Way back when I was managing the Yankees…or was it the Mets?...well, it was one of those two teams…I said, ‘if we're going to win the pennant, we've got to start thinking we're not as good as we think we are.’ The Caps won one game last night, not a Stanley Cup. Don’t get cocky, guys…play the way you can, and you’ll be alright.
Well, there you have it…our esteemed panel has the Caps coming out on top tonight, and if there is one thing The Peerless has learned, there is safety in herds. Tonight is the Caps’ night…
Caps 3 – Hurricanes 2….yes, Casey?
“Peerless, lemme give you some advice…never make predictions, especially about the future.”
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