Yo, Vinnie, lookadis column by dis chiacchierone... talkin' 'bout "rearrangin' a guy's face." Like dis Godard guy is gonna come heavy and bust up dis Ovechkin guy, just cuz he mussed up dis Malkin's hair a little. Whatta jamook.
Hey yo, Vinnie, dis Madden guy...maybe he watches too many 'Sopranos' reruns on dat Ayyy an' Eeeee channel, you know what I'm talkin' about? Seen too many Godfaddah movies. Hey, maybe he can be in da Godfaddah remake...he can play Clemenza....he sure has da look down. Besides, I seen dis Ovechkin...Madonn', he got da stugots. He's whackin' guys all over de ice. An' he already looks like he's had dat face rearranged...you see dat nose? Looks like an off ramp on da Jersey Turnpike.
Ya know, Vinnie...if dis Madden guy has any ideas about whackin' somebody, he oughtta be lookin' at dat Bettman guy. I hadda beef widdat Bettman guy every since he had dis idea about shootouts. Don' he know dats somethin' best left to da garbage business?