Wednesday, October 13, 2010
Two Russians Walk Into An ESPN Studio
Seems as if the Capitals Season Ticket Holder outing is being rescheduled in anticipation of inclement weather expected tomorrow. One drawback of the change in schedule is that Capitals Alex Ovechkin and Semyon Varlamov will not be able to attend, as they will be in Bristol, CT, to film a "This Is SportsCenter" ad for ESPN.
There is a sense of anticipation about the filming, having read in a couple of places already that while no details can be divulged, it will be a great ad. It gets us to wondering just what sort of ad these two wacky kids might be filming...
-- Ovechkin's head on a studio desk cackling at a forlorn Varlamov sitting in the anchor chair, "AH-hahahahaha...only fat chicks in Connecticut!"
-- Varlamov and Ovechkin in John Buccigross' office teaching him how to say, "Sidney Crosby sucks" in Russian.
-- Ovechkin in a cubicle ordering two dozen pizzas to be delivered to Chris Berman's office... "and your name, sir?" "Ron Jaworski."
-- Varlamov and Ovechkin standing in the middle of the ESPN reporters' bullpen and shouting at the top of their lungs..."Versus is sick, ESPN sucks!!!"
-- Ovechkin and Varlamov on ESPN radio set with bobbleheads of NHLers all around, opening their new show... "Ovi and Varly in the Morning."
-- Varlamov and Ovechkin on glass and chrome TV set, getting last make up for new show, "Pardon the Russian (Accent)." Varlamov looks into the camera, waves flag while saying, "Good Night Russia."
-- Ovechkin walking down corridor, arm around PTI's Mike Wilbon... "so, you think Crosby is better hockey player?" Varlamov peeks around the corner, "Ovi, don't listen to him, he's a basketball writer."
-- Ovechkin and Varlamov are talking in ESPN hallway, Scott Van Pelt walks by with bald head done up like goalie mask paint job. Varlamov nods approvingly, Ovechkin just shakes his head.
OK, so the ad has to be better than this.