Tuesday, April 17, 2012

Thirty-Seven Years Is A Long Time

As the Capitals prepare to try to even the first round series with the Boston Bruins, we are reminded that the Capitals have been around since the 1974-1975 season and have yet to win a Stanley Cup.

Thirty-seven years ago at this time the Caps were sitting at home, watching the playoffs after posting the platinum standard of futility for an NHL regular season. That is a story not worth retelling. We keep thinking of just how long ago 1975 is. Here are some things that had not yet happened as the Caps were sitting at home watching the playoffs…

  • Busch Gardens Williamsburg Theme Park had not yet opened (May 5, 1975).
  • Jimmy Hoffa was still walking the streets (he would be reported missing on July 31st).
  • The Louisiana Superdome had not yet opened (August 3rd).
  • Robert E. Lee had not yet been pardoned (President Gerald R. Ford did so on August 5th, thus restoring to the General his full rights of citizenship…no truth to the rumor he voted in Chicago in the 1976 election).
  • President Ford had not yet been the target of assassination attempts (September 5th and September 22nd, by Lynette Fromme and Sara Jane Moore, respectively).
  • Riverfront Coliseum had not yet opened in Cincinnati.
  • The United States still did not have a Roman Catholic saint (Elizabeth Seton was canonized on September 14th).
  • Fugitive Patricia Hearst, kidnapped by the Symbionese Liberation Army but having later allegedly joined the group, had not yet been captured (September 18th).
  • Carlton Fisk had not yet willed a fly ball to stay fair at Fenway Park in the 12th inning of Game 6 of the World Series (October 21st).
  • Gordon Lightfoot still didn’t have a sunk boat to sing about (the Edmund Fitzgerald sank off Whitefish Bay on Lake Superior on November 10th).
  • Ronald Reagan still had not been a declared Presidential candidate (he announced on November 20th that he would challenge President Ford for the Republican nomination for President).
  • The Rocky Horror Picture Show was not yet “The Rocky Horror Picture Show” (it was released on November 26th)
  • There was no “Microsoft” (“Micro-soft” was a term used by the first time by Bill Gates in a letter to Paul Allen on November 29th; “Microsoft” would be registered as a trademark a year later).
  • David Beckham wasn’t bending anything (born on May 2nd).
  • Christina Hendricks wasn’t making any men mad (born May 3rd).
  • Ray Lewis wasn’t making life dreary for NFL quarterbacks (born May 15th).
  • London Fletcher wasn’t announcing any re-signings with any local football teams (born May 19th).
  • There was not even a “Daniel Tosh, 1.0” (born on May 29th).
  • Angelina Jolie had yet to adopt any children (born June 4th).
  • Allen Iverson was not yet not talking about practice (born June 7th).
  • Martin St. Louis had yet to torment the Caps (born June 18th).
  • Tobey Maguire had yet to become afraid of spiders, let alone play one in the movies (born June 27th).
  • Evgeni Nabokov had yet to wear a diaper, let alone goalie pads (born July 25th).
  • A-Rod was just A-fetus (Alex Rodriguez was born on July 27th).
  • Kate Winslet wasn’t yet threatening to jump off the back of doomed cruise ships (born October 5th).
  • Tiger Woods wasn’t even “Eldrick” yet (born on December 30th).
  • Moe Howard was still a “stooge” (passed away on May 4th).
  • Rod Serling was not quite yet in The Twilight Zone (died on June 28th).
  • Casey Stengel was still wondering if anybody here could play this game (passed away on September 29th).
  • Francisco Franco was not yet “still dead” (died on November 20th).
  • And there was not yet a “Saturday Night Live” for Chevy Chase to keep us updated on Generalissimo Franco’s condition (SNL debuted on October 11th).
  • IBM had not yet introduced its first desktop computer (the 5100 was introduced in September).
  • Arthur Treacher was still making fish and chips (died on December 14th).
  • An inordinate fear of sharks had not yet set in among Americans (the film “Jaws” was released on June 20th).
  • Roger Ebert was not yet “Roger Ebert” (at least the TV version, anyway; his show – “Sneak Preveiws” with Gene Siskel – debuted on November 23rd).
  • Average cost of a gallon of gasoline: 44 cents.
  • Average cost of a new house: $39,300.
  • Average cost of a new car: $4,250.
  • The first Space Shuttle had not yet been rolled out (“Enterprise” was rolled out on September 17th).
  • Bill Clinton was still single (he married Hillary Rodham on October 11th).
  • The “San Diego Chicken” had just been unveiled (April 15th).
  • Bruce Springsteen had not yet been on the cover of “Time” magazine (October 27th)
  • The Pittsburgh Penguins had not yet gagged on a 3-0 playoff series lead (they would lose four straight to the New York Islanders, the last loss coming on April 26th).
  • The Washington Capitals had not yet won their second road game (they won their first on March 28th; would not win another until the 1975-1976 season).
Thirty-seven years is a long time. Please, guys…don’t make us wait another 37 years for a Stanley Cup.

1 comment:

Darla said...

Darla bought her Trans-Am on April 6.