'Tis the Season... A Bonus Lockout Carol

Bettman we have heard on high
Speaking at the podium
And the press in sweet reply
Mumble softly, “uh, er, um..”

Gloria, in excelsis Gary!
Gloria, in excelsis Gary!

Owners sit by silently,
But their actions do prolong.
Without gladsome tidings be
They’re content to be headstrong.

Gloria, in excelsis Gary!
Gloria, in excelsis Gary!

Come down to New York and see
Whether we can end this thing;
Come and meet so secretly,
Stay two hours, and then take wing.

Gloria, in excelsis Gary!
Gloria, in excelsis Gary!

See the mess these suits have made
Gary, Don, and Proskauer Rose;
It’s enough, this sick charade
For fans to stay away in droves.

Gloria, in excelsis Gary!
Gloria, in excelsis Gary!