Tuesday, June 04, 2013

Washington Capitals -- The Dangers of Late-Night Pizza

Try as we might, sometimes we just cannot resist the desire for a pepperoni, anchovy, and marshmallow fluff pizza.  And when we succumb to that guilty pleasure, odd dreams are sure to follow.  Such was the case last evening when the thunder clouds of peppery, fishy fluff rumbling in our stomach combined with watching playoff hockey resulted in odd visions in our sleep…

It was several years into the future, each year of playoff futility by the Washington Capitals adding one more length of chain that we Caps fans bear as the price for following this club.  The disappointment of promise unfulfilled, of chances missed, the knock of opportunity unanswered weighs heavily after another early round playoff exit. 

Another season begins, and the hope that accompanies it sprouts once more.  Maybe this year will be different.  But something is amiss.  What was once unparalleled chemistry between Alex Ovechkin and Nicklas Backstrom just isn’t there.  Passes are off the mark, shots are shanked.  They are not on the same page.  There seems to be a growing lack of communication.

They seem to have grown apart.

And then we realize… Ovechkin and Backstrom will have been linemates since the 2007-2008 season.  They are under contract together through the 2019-2020 season (Ovechkin would still have one year to go on his deal).  Thirteen years together.  It would be quite a run…

…until you look up the statistics and find that the median length of time for first marriages in the United States is eight years.

And then the whispers start about giving Ovechkin a chance to win a Cup before his contract ends and he returns to Russia… or maybe moving Backstrom to a contender to give him a shot at a Cup that he didn’t win in Washington.  The speculation starts…

...Ovechkin to Pittsburgh
...Backstrom to New York
...Ovechkin to Chicago
...Backstrom to Boston
...Ovechkin to Florida to skate with that MacKinnon fellow who already has a Cup with the Panthers
...Backstrom to Colorado, who is looking to add another Cup to the one already won by Duchene, O’Reilly, Landeskog, and Jones

And then we wake up, bolt upright in a cold sweat muttering…

“Win a Cup, you guys, and soon, because marriages don’t last forever.”

We really do have to lay off that pizza.